TAKING THINGS SLOW

Hey guys! I'm so sorry for the lack of updates. 

Today I'm here to write a really casual life update, and to let you guys know what I've been up to recently.

So I was really busy with uni. Assignments start to come one after another, not forgetting to mention a mid-term exam coming up next week. The mid-term exam is considered as our final piece, which means if we fail that test, we will have to retake the entire module again next semester. Well, it's not that I think I would fail, but I was just so afraid that I would have not enough time to revise on everything that I need to score well in the test. 

I was so stressed up. 

I was totally worn-out. 

I pushed myself so hard that my brain was on the verge of exploding.

I was panicking about not having enough time to complete everything by their respective due dates.

In actual fact, it was just me overly pressurising myself.

Let's say I'm given an assignment that is due next week. I would start working on the assignment 2-3 weeks before the due date. 

And I couldn't go a day without doing it until completion. I would just feel super guilty for not staying committed to the assignment when I have the time for it. 

I spent my weekend completing my work, while I'm actually still far from the due date, because I just never fancied the idea of doing things at the eleventh hour. I always like to complete a task at least 1 week before the due date, which sometimes causes me a lot of unnecessary stress. Sometimes, I would even try to complete all tasks in my to-do-list in a single day.

But it the end, as I got slowly consumed by a grip of guilt that is constantly reaching out to my throat, I eventually felt that I am letting up. I am failing myself. What never came to my mind was that I actually still have time.

Now that I look back to those weekends I pulled through, they were collectively a huge lump of unnecessary stress for myself, which only serves to wear my mind. Knowing my situation, Teddy said "There are about 101 things that you can stress about, and there's nothing you can do to change that. What you can do instead is change how you take them on."

I should have taken one step at a time. I should have given myself some time to breathe.

People who know my way of work always praise me for my efficiency, but what goes behind my "efficiency" was a toll so unnecessarily taxing and heavy to bear.

I am done rushing through life. I should learn to take things slow.

And as interesting as it gets, by the mere thought of it, I can already feel stress gradually slipping off my shoulders.